How Low Can You Go?

DRIVIN' WITH YOUR EYES CLOSED
Okay, I'm calm. I know it's not even the All Star break. I know there is more than half a season of baseball left to play. But after going 1-2 in a home series against a team that came in with a record 16 games below .500 and being outscored in those 3 games 20-8...well, WTF? That was preceded by fairly lackluster performances against Milwaukee and Pittsburgh and a "I think we've turned the corner" series against the Mets (who just fired their manager today). It certainly won't get any easier this week with games against Oakland, Minnesota and Boston.

When do we hit bottom? When do we stop "scuffling"? When do we stop taking the proverbial one step forward, two steps back? When does this young, streaky team start delivering a string of good solid baseball games featuring a complete package of steady defense, timely hitting, and rock solid pitching from start to finish? Is that too much to freaking ask? How much comfort am I supposed to take in the fact that we cling to the division lead because every other team is playing even lousier ball than we are? How far will that get us against Philly or Chicago in a playoff series?


IT DON'T MEAN A THING (IF YOU AIN'T GOT THAT SWING)
Where is the spark? I'm hoping it's on the DL and will step up to re-ignite this team when it returns with hopefully a good pair of legs because this team and its fans are in danger of being weighed down by the anchor of apathy currently knotted around their necks. When Eric Byrnes comes off the DL Justin Upton should go down to Tucson to get his swing back. While they're at it, maybe they can get the kid an eye test. Is he seeing the ball at all? Because it looks to me like he's just guessing up there at most every pitch.

And then there is this: There is some concern that pitching ace Brandon Webb may be suffering from a "dead arm". That news alone should send every D*Backs fan to the corner drugstore for their Xanax refill.

No, it's too early to panic, but if current trends continue it may soon be too late. This team has not been playing like a championship team for the past several weeks. At some point there will be a critical juncture at which it will be determined if this team's true identity belongs to the Diamondbacks of April (19-8) or the Diamondbacks of May (11-17). Circumstances will require them to step up and prove what they are made of and no one will be able to accuse circumstances of being band wagoners, not filling the stands or not making enough signs.

I'M JUST GETTING STARTED
Please, I know the D*Backs strive to be different with their 6:40 weeknight start times but can we just ditch the 5:10 Saturday home starts? PLEASE??? This is Ari-freaking-zona. Even with the air conditioning the ballpark is noticeably less comfortable. What purpose does it serve other than to get the fans to trek downtown during the hottest part of the day and quench their thirst with $8 beers and $6 sodas? Oh, and while you're at it, might as well eat dinner, too, so grab yourself one of those $7 hamburgers. Seriously, what a blatant piece of marketing crap.

Do they really think we're that stupid? (Someone is gonna answer that, and I think I know what he's going to say.)